Eloping With Family: How to Include Family in Your Elopement
For some couples, the ideal elopement day looks like just the two of them, no guests and no one else around. But if you can’t imagine getting married without your mom to button the dress for you, or your sisters by your side, or the cousin who’s been your best friend since you were born, you can still elope! Including family in your elopement can often make it more special and meaningful, if it’s what you truly want – because remember, eloping is all about doing what feels right to you. This guide to eloping with family will give you some ideas for including them in your day, and some tips to work out the logistics of having guests!
Is Eloping With Family Right for You?
The first question when it comes to eloping with family is whether you want to do it! This might be a gut reaction – if you know that your day just wouldn’t feel right without your loved ones, that’s great. But for some couples, it can be a little more complicated. There’s often a lot of pressure when it comes to weddings, and it’s important to make sure that the decisions you make about your elopement are truly what you want, and what’s best for you!
Consider whether your family supports your decision to elope, and whether having them there with you will make the day better. Does being surrounded by your loved ones make you more excited for the day?
Make your guest list early on, and decide who you’re inviting!
Tips for Eloping With Family
Once you’ve decided that eloping with family is right for you, here are some tips to ensure a great experience!
SET YOUR BOUNDARIES
One thing that’s important to establish from the beginning is what your boundaries are when it comes to the elopement day. Decide who you’re inviting, and make sure they know who’s invited too! You don’t want the guest list to unintentionally get longer, so let your family know right away that you’ve decided on a list of invitees and that it’s final.
Set boundaries too about how involved you want your family to be in the planning process – some family members, though we love them, can be well meaning but pushy, so it’s a good idea to establish these things early on so that you don’t find yourself getting steamrolled when it comes to the way you get married.
FINDING A LOCATION WHEN ELOPING WITH FAMILY
Having guests at your elopement means you’ll need to consider them when it comes to your elopement location. First, the size of your guest list might affect which locations you can choose from – usually (but not always, so check the regulations for any potential spots!) you start to run into restrictions if you have more than 10 people total at your ceremony. But, there are plenty of beautiful places that can accommodate more people, so don’t let that deter you!
Another consideration might be how accessible your location is. Does eloping with family mean that you need to look for a spot that’s easier to get to? Everyone’s family is different of course, so think about whether there are mobility or travel considerations with your guests!
SPLIT UP YOUR DAY
If you’re eloping with family, I still recommend taking a little bit of time to yourselves! Having a two day elopement is great for this, because it allows you to have one day with family, and one day where you and your partner go on whatever adventure you want, just the two of you.
But even if you just do one day, you can still split up the day to give the two of you some time together, to just enjoy some time with your new spouse!
Elopement Ideas With Family
When eloping with family, it can be fun to get them involved in your day! Here are some ideas for how they can be included.
HAVE A FAMILY MEMBER OFFICIATE
Someone who knows you well will be able to create a ceremony that’s unique to you. Getting ordained is really easy, and having a family member perform your ceremony can be a great way to give them a role in your day, and to add a personal touch!
GIVE THEM TRADITIONAL WEDDING ROLES
Though you’re eloping, you can still incorporate some traditional wedding roles! If you have children attending, it can be really fun to have them be a ring bearer or flower girl – though throwing flower petals may not be LNT friendly, so an alternative like ribbons or bubbles may be better.
ASK YOUR FAMILY TO GIVE SPEECHES
Another great way to include your family in your elopement is by asking them to give a toast, or say something, or if you have a musical or artsy family they can even perform a song or read a poem. This can be done at the ceremony, or you can plan a little reception after!
INVOLVE THEM IN THE PLANNING PROCESS
Having people to bounce ideas off of and to ask for advice is always helpful, so you can also ask your family for help with the planning process! Whether that’s going shopping with you or giving input on the location, this is a great way to help them feel involved in your elopement day – and can also be a nice way to include people who may not be there for the actual elopement too.
PLAN AN ELOPEMENT RECEPTION
You can have a small reception afterwards, and have dinner with your family and do toasts and cake, and maybe some s’mores around a campfire, but a lot of couples who have a small elopement plan a bigger reception afterwards – whether that’s on the same day or even weeks later. This is a great way to get the best of both worlds, and to have an intimate ceremony while still being able to celebrate with the people you love!
Thinking About Eloping With Family?
My job as an elopement photographer is to create an incredible experience for you, and one that’s personalized to you and what you want! So if eloping with family is what feels right for you, I’ll help you navigate elopement locations, create a custom timeline, and everything you need to plan the perfect day.
If you’re ready to start planning your elopement, contact me!
